There is nothing wrong with you. Your broken heart is not an indication that you are broken. You re hurt, there s a difference. Something broken can be fixed independently of who broke it. A hurt person heals amid the remorse, accountability, and responsiveness of the person who injured them. Permit yourself to stop feeling bad about not forgiving quickly enough for your partner, your therapist, or anyone else. So the better our relationships are in terms of providing us with a sense of, I can depend on you the more we are able to move fully into the rest of our lives, face insecurity and take risks. In this way our adult relationships mirror our relationship with our parents as children; both, when functioning well, provide us with a secure base from which we can enter our worlds with confidence. Pornographers understand that millions are addicted to their material and a lot more addicted daily. The pornography industry is the biggest drug cartel in the world! Table of Contents The Neuroscience Behind Sex Addiction Neuroscience shows us that there is little difference in the physical or chemical changes in the pleasure and control centers of the brain, whether the addiction is from a chemical or an experience. Masturbation almost always includes fantasy and for true sex addicts such fantasy can amplify into a downward spiral of obsession, objectification and eventually full-fledged compulsion. This is especially true when pornography is included as part of a masturbation ritual. From this perspective masturbation may need to be considered off-limits for many sex addicts. Boundaries provide a framework for your husband to take responsibility for his own healing journey and give you the space to focus on your healing, which is equally important for the marriage s recovery. Trusting your husband again should not be forced but should come naturally as he follows the boundaries set during the recovery process. Recently I asked my husband how he was doing with his addiction. I didn t really need to ask, because his actions and accountability tell me everything I need to know, but it was reassuring nonetheless when he told me, Covenant Eyes has removed the temptation for me. I feel like a weight has been lifted and I don t have the daily mental struggle of it all.
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