She feels angry and hopeless but ultimately relieved that she has finally admitted to having an addiction to sexual behaviors. The grief stage. In another six-month period, the sex addict goes through a type of grief. She feels terrible about the damage she has caused to herself and to others. She also grieves the loss of her addiction because she used it like a crutch for a long period of time. The Gospels record Jesus asking a total of 307 questions throughout His ministry. One takes place at the pool of Bethesda and is recorded in the Gospel of John, Chapter 5. Here, we are told of Jesus asking a paralytic, Do you want to get well? We utilize both content and insights from a sermon series on 10 Questions Jesus Asked presented by Pastor Jeff Manion of Ada Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Step 5: Finally, if after being proactive in these ways, that need still remains, can we surrender that need? Can we see if God might work in that space and bring about something we could not? Or teach us something about ourselves that we may have needed to know? Putting It Together Let s walk it through with an example: Let s say you are at your spouse s work event on a Friday evening. It took years for me to truly understand that this addiction is very much a physical pathway problem in the brain. The biggest struggle for my husband through this heartbreaking addiction was the concept of integrity and honesty. I firmly believe that true recovery is not even remotely possible until all the cards are face up on the table. The secondary gain is that you begin to apply this constructively compassionate mindset to others as well. The Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model incorporates these skills to help you to become less reactive to your environment and the reality of the betrayal. You replace the fear with a constructive compassion that is reinforced using the Ford Isomorphic Path to Self-Intimacy. As clinicians, we have to embrace our inner case manager to keep up with the demands of this work. And remember, we play an important role in helping clients who are struggling with sexual addiction. With counseling, they can learn that sex is not a bad thing and that they can experience it in a healthy way.