It s crucial to emphasize that boundaries are not about revenge or policing but about providing structure and space for healing and rebuilding trust. Personal action items may involve seeking personal counseling for emotional healing, along with creating a plan for different scenarios based on your husband s response to recovery efforts. These are the types of questions that every betrayed partner asks. Betrayed partners believe that they cannot heal unless they know why their beloved cheated on them. But in the case of chronic betrayers, their reasons lie deep below the surface, much like the iceberg that sank the Titanic. The question becomes, Why would someone who appears to be functioning well act against their morals and values? Darrin Ford explains in his Isomorphic Path to Intimacy that to gain intimacy as a couple it needs to begin with self-intimacy, and furthermore, partners need to practice distress tolerance and be present with the uncomfortable emotionality that is an inevitable outcome of a partner s natural state manifesting from the betrayal. , a significant amount of people with sex addiction experienced emotional abuse (97%), sexual abuse (81%) or physical abuse (72%) in childhood. Furthermore, people who came from rigid, uninvolved and emotionally absent families were also more likely to experience sex addiction (77%). In other words, sex addicts often come from childhood environments in which they never learned how to create and maintain emotional bonds. Is willing to be forthright about STI history and willing to speak openly about a potential partner s STI history before sex Desires a relationship not out of need or desperation, but as a reasoned decision to add value to his or her life As the SLAA 12 Promises state: Love will be a committed, thoughtful decision, rather than a feeling by which we are overwhelmed. Recovery and treatment for sexual addiction Written by Focus on the Family Canada What's inside this article The five components to treatment 2. Stopping rituals 3. Stopping fantasy 4. Healing despair 5. Healing shame There is hope for recovery from sexual addiction. Recovery is a process that occurs over time.