My heart has healed over these last 6 years as we have each grown into stronger, more compassionate people. The biggest victory for my husband has been his success at work. Before Covenant Eyes, he had started watching pornography at work multiple times each day. His boss was asking him why he spent so much time on his phone in the bathroom, and there was simply no excuse for his lack of productivity. After betrayal, many couples feel so unsafe that they disconnect from loved ones and disappear from the life they knew together. Trusting a different therapist with the details of your relationship is no small thing. It takes a lot to offer trust and to earn it. Doing so after betrayal. Is a monumental feat. It s crucial to emphasize that boundaries are not about revenge or policing but about providing structure and space for healing and rebuilding trust. Personal action items may involve seeking personal counseling for emotional healing, along with creating a plan for different scenarios based on your husband s response to recovery efforts. They feel alone and afraid and believe they are unworthy of love; they believe that no one can truly love them because they are unlovable. Therefore, they learn from a very young age that intimacy is dangerous in real life and that they can trust themselves only to meet their needs. In an article titled Can serial cheaters change? What you do need to do after a slip is to double your resolve, get back into your meetings, talk with your sponsor, and forgive yourself. Learn from the slip it s an important part of your recovery. Other Means of Recovery If 12-step meetings prove not to be appropriate for you for whatever reason, there are other avenues. If the additive behavior manifests in the workplace, the employer may have to terminate the person because the addictive behavior is affecting their work productivity. The internet, dating apps and virtual reality have ushered in a new world of opportunities for the sex addict. The saying a kid in a candy store has never been more applicable as it pertains to the anonymity, accessibility, variety and cost-free options that technology provides.