So sex addiction recovery is about far more than one-day-at-a-time abstinence; it s real work we do on who we are, how we were formed and how we communicate with others. When the work has begun in earnest, and after real time has been put in, only then can healthy relationships stand a chance of developing for addicts. If you are in a relationship with someone you have sexually betrayed, an agreed-upon time without sex can allow for some relationship healing to begin by giving you an opportunity to focus on developing nonsexual emotional safety and connection. (I wrote a lengthy article about what it takes to heal from chronic sexual deception, because there's a lot to address. Your healing process is directly connected to your partner s ability to help you heal not anyone else s timing. Remember: Your betraying partner should be there for you. Surrendering to them or a process is not a thing. This is not war. Your betraying partner should make sure you are supported into trusting them. With counseling, they can learn that sex is not a bad thing and that they can experience it in a healthy way. Scott Stolarick is a licensed clinical professional counselor who has been practicing in the state of Illinois for 30 years. He is an experienced administrator and clinical supervisor as well as a seasoned clinician. Crisis to Growth: The Stages of Sex Addiction Recovery Sex addiction is a true behavioral addiction, and it is one that people battle every day. If you are struggling to control your impulses when it comes to sexual behaviors, you may need to get professional help. The good news about sex addiction treatment is that many experts believe that you can recover from it. Your reactivity decreases and your distress acceptance takes the charge out of the fear equation. The secondary gain is that you begin to apply this constructively compassionate mindset to others as well. The Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model incorporates these skills to help you to become less reactive to your environment and the reality of the betrayal.