It was the therapist that indicated his inability to surrender and heal was holding back recovery. Was this a special case? Sadly no, too often, many betrayed spouses receive this message. The additional emotional burden results in further confusion and harm. Both are unnecessary and further delay the betrayal trauma recovery the couple needs. The acting out had very little to do with the relationship or the partner. Many mental health professionals do not believe that sex addiction is a legitimate disorder. Therapists often think that the betrayed partner is the problem because they re not enough not attentive enough, not available enough, not sexual enough, not thin enough, not voluptuous enough. They develop the ability to share their truths, including feelings of pain, sadness or ambiguity. And they learn that a relationship is something to value but not something they need to survive or to feel good about themselves. A recovering addict who has accomplished these things and desires a healthy relationship may consider some factors for further readiness. Sue Johnson, the founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples says that betrayal traumas, overwhelm coping capacities and define the relationship, as a source of danger rather than a safe haven in times of stress. When that special someone that we have bonded with betrays us it messes us up because all of a sudden the person who is our secure base in the world has caused us untold pain and robbed us of our sense of safety. Sexual compulsivity, including behaviors like pornography addiction, are always rooted in sexual pleasure. The rush from pornography addiction or other types of sexual compulsivity is the way some users counteract feelings of inadequacy or emotional torment they may have experienced as a child or young teen. -J.R.R. Tolkien The Prevalence and Impact of Pornography Addiction Sex addiction treatment is one of the most challenging addictions to treat because it strikes at the core of our humanity. Interest in sexuality is a primary driving force in human beings. It is pleasurable for a reason and necessary for the human race to exist.