As anger ferments, it can lead to rage. Rage can wreak havoc on the body, leading to health problems. The solution is forgiveness. Many partners worry that they will be expected to forgive their betrayer. But forgiveness is not about forgetting nor is it about condoning bad behavior. Instead, forgiveness is a process of opting out of anger and the need for revenge forgiving the human qualities that lead people to act in terrible ways. When anxiety and trauma are severe enough, the sexual behavior can become all-consuming. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a common treatment for those with a sex addiction rooted in trauma. EMDR is a trauma-focused therapy that helps patients identify and process their trauma. Often, trauma gets stored in the right side of the brain (the emotional side). Constructively compassionate is defined as allowing oneself to be fully present with the experience of oneself, while fostering a mutual acceptance of suffering, to bring a kinder reaction to distressing emotionality. This is intimacy with the self. That intimacy then ripples out into every other aspect of the partner s life. The brain responds to visual sexual images in microseconds, and the chemical reactions take place instantly and automatically. Many claim that this behavior is normal or mere entertainment because of the chemical brain s power and capacity to shut out the conscience. They don t look for treatment because they feel there is no addiction. If medications have been prescribed, manages their use safely and consistently and attends doctor and therapy appointments regularly Has been screened for STIs and treated when necessary. Is willing to be forthright about STI history and willing to speak openly about a potential partner s STI history before sex Desires a relationship not out of need or desperation, but as a reasoned decision to add value to his or her life As the SLAA 12 Promises state: Love will be a committed, thoughtful decision, rather than a feeling by which we are overwhelmed. Instead, the goal should be a pursuit of healthy sexual behavior and true intimacy. You should strive, then, to see authentic love. What If You Relapse? Having a relapse plan is something you should be familiar with from your days in treatment. If, however, you didn t attend a treatment program for sexual addiction and are starting your quest for healing mostly on your own, a relapse plan is something that you should prepare.