Pick up your mat and walk. At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked. But there is a twist to this story of healing! At some point later, Jesus finds him in the temple and a follow-up conversation occurs. Jesus says to him, See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you. Holiness Means Receiving God s Grace For Christians, overcoming pornography is not primarily about self-discipline or willpower. It s about God s grace working in a believer s life. Christians should rely on God s strength through prayer, Scripture, the Holy Spirit, and Christian community, rather than trying to conquer sin by their own efforts (Philippians 2:13). I didn t really need to ask, because his actions and accountability tell me everything I need to know, but it was reassuring nonetheless when he told me, Covenant Eyes has removed the temptation for me. I feel like a weight has been lifted and I don t have the daily mental struggle of it all. Full Transparency Everyone deserves a marriage that has full transparency. To survive that process (and understand it with your marriage improved) you must get in the trenches together. The couples we counsel are forewarned that recovery is not pretty. There is no expectation that they will navigate it in the most positive way possible. Pretending to be positive only makes matters untrustworthy and messier for longer. Some addicts hit bottom soon after the addiction cycle begins. Others spend years, even decades, caught in the addiction cycle, engaging in risky and dangerous sexual behaviors before they acknowledge that they need help. Still others never reach, or refuse to reach, the realization they are addicted to sex. This kind of trauma can even include parental enmeshment, which is when parents derive all of their happiness and self-worth from their children and their children s achievements. While neglect and enmeshment are in many ways polar opposite parenting styles, they can both lead to unhealthy attachment styles that may contribute to sex addiction.