They will have to come to this awareness independently because the more one tells them how destructive this behavior is, the more defensive and justified they will become. Those who have made it out of this industry will always know it was destructive and unhealthy. Still, for them to admit it, they have to get out of it first and seek sex addiction treatment. Either might lead her to ask many questions that sometimes her husband may or may not be willing to answer. Truthful answers allow for more of the puzzle pieces to take shape. However, trust is only really built from someone who is willing to offer the truth, the whole truth, without being asked. The problem with questioning is that a betrayed woman may wonder if she has not asked just the right question, or enough questions, so her mind will continue to obsess about what she has missed. This allows the betrayal trauma response to calm as you gain the ability to be present with the natural normal distress resulting from the discovery that the addict has betrayed them. Your reactivity decreases and your distress acceptance takes the charge out of the fear equation. The secondary gain is that you begin to apply this constructively compassionate mindset to others as well. On a practical level, it looks like replacing sinful habits (like watching porn) with new things, like learning more about God, investing time with people, showing kindness, and using your resources to help and encourage others. However, since this is produced by the Spirit, it s not just a matter of forcing yourself to be more spiritual. How to Help Your Partner Heal from Betrayal and Move Forward By Idit Sharoni After infidelity, hurt partners have so many questions. One of the most pressing and worrisome amid betrayal trauma recovery is, Who will help me heal? A woman & a man smiling, looking at each other admirably. Representing the feeling partners in the United States can feel, after finding the right guidance to handle betrayal trauma recovery. It can have extreme consequences on one s emotional, psychological and social well-being. When the American Psychiatric Association made the bold decision not to include sex addiction in the DSM-5 (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition), many felt the choice was controversial.