I personally believe that a clinician treating someone with a sexual addiction should have some level of clinical experience in this area. Counselors should not venture into this arena because they think it is interesting or they want to learn along with the client. This could be significantly more harmful than helpful and could lead the client and all those associated with the client down the wrong path. Readers reviews3 of Your Sexually Addicted Spouse2 indicate that the book offers the spouse an understanding of her trauma, supports her needs, validates her long-term suspicions, and serves as an important pillar of her healing journey. The Spouse s Choice in the Face of Sex Addiction It can be a rough road to healing for the spouse. A core concept from 12-step recovery programs is that there is a profound difference between true sobriety and mere abstinence. From this perspective, sobriety is much more than staying away from unwanted behavior. It includes a deep sense of serenity and a consistent ability to "live life on life's terms", often with deep connections with other people and a sense of meaning in daily life. When we lead a couple through full disclosure, the husband (or unfaithful partner), creates a time-line of his entire sexual history, starting from birth. In fiveyear increments, he builds the story of how his sexuality developed. In the early years, many husbands have rather normal experiences of sexual experimenting which contribute to the shaping of sexual identity and development. Darrin Ford explains in his Isomorphic Path to Intimacy that to gain intimacy as a couple it needs to begin with self-intimacy, and furthermore, partners need to practice distress tolerance and be present with the uncomfortable emotionality that is an inevitable outcome of a partner s natural state manifesting from the betrayal. Years ago, a secular magazine published an article about Covenant Eyes, suggesting we block unholy web content. Naturally, the author used the word ironically. She meant Christian prudery. But holiness is much more than this. Hebrews 12:14 instructs Christians to pursue holiness because, without it no one will see the Lord.