Tolkien Pornographers are keenly aware of the content I will share with you. They are trying to do everything possible to keep this addiction treatment information from reaching you. They don t talk about it, nor will they. Pornographers understand that millions are addicted to their material and a lot more addicted daily. Acting out is not about love or sex; instead, acting out numbs the overwhelming agony of being loved by a real-life partner. The root of addiction and the brain science At the root of addiction is trauma. Trauma is the problem, and for some, sexual acting out is the solution until the solution fails. Recovery is also very much about recognizing that much of who we ve presented ourselves to be to others, and many of the ways we ve chosen to do it, have been based on dishonesty. It is in learning how to have real closeness with others authentic intimacy that we begin to heal. To do that, we ll need to spend a bit of time understanding the early wounds that created our intimacy disordered behavior (addictions). I personally believe that a clinician treating someone with a sexual addiction should have some level of clinical experience in this area. Counselors should not venture into this arena because they think it is interesting or they want to learn along with the client. This could be significantly more harmful than helpful and could lead the client and all those associated with the client down the wrong path. Readers reviews3 of Your Sexually Addicted Spouse2 indicate that the book offers the spouse an understanding of her trauma, supports her needs, validates her long-term suspicions, and serves as an important pillar of her healing journey. The Spouse s Choice in the Face of Sex Addiction It can be a rough road to healing for the spouse. During this period, the addict gets intensive therapy, learns to take responsibility for her actions, deepens her relationships with her loved ones and learns to have a healthy relationship with sex. The growth stage. This final stage can last two years or more and is the final step in becoming completely healed from sex addiction.