These boundaries aim to provide space for both partners to heal and avoid conflict escalation. If your safety is at risk, you should not tolerate physical or sexual violence and should seek help from appropriate authorities. Common physical boundaries include: Exiting volatile situations: Remove yourself when conflicts become heated. These ways of being limit the capacity for intimate and safe connection within relationship. When we were infants, we were current and congruent with our physical and emotional needs and were able - in present time - to express those needs to our caregivers. How those expressions of need were responded to set the foundation of our attachment style. He needs to want what he has lost, or what he is about to lose, more than he wants the emotionally mind-numbing and ultimately life-destroying effects of sex addiction. Some addicts hit bottom soon after the addiction cycle begins. Others spend years, even decades, caught in the addiction cycle, engaging in risky and dangerous sexual behaviors before they acknowledge that they need help. Today, after years of working on recovery, he no longer has this problem. He finds it easier to be more productive and engaged in his job. He no longer feels the pull of pornography coming from his phone at all times, at home and at work. My biggest personal victory has been the peace and confidence I feel when I help my children navigate the world of technology. The partner of a sex addict, for example, may feel disregarded, betrayed, devalued, replaced, insufficient and so on. If the additive behavior manifests in the workplace, the employer may have to terminate the person because the addictive behavior is affecting their work productivity. The internet, dating apps and virtual reality have ushered in a new world of opportunities for the sex addict. I realized then that it is impossible to "kill off" the addiction, and that hating and controlling the addict part of themselves could only lead back to shame and problems. That afternoon, I sat down with the guys and we had a group treatment experience. For an hour, we did gestalt work talking to that poor, ugly stuffed dragon.