This is often best obtained by attending 12-step meetings. This is where you can find a sponsor, which is a person who has extensive sobriety who provides ongoing personal support and mentoring. Meeting attendance is also a good way to develop relationships with people who are sources of accountability and support. Volunteering information is a process of owning one s faults and sinful behaviors. It allows for brokenness and repentance. It also begins the long journey of trust-building. When we lead a couple through full disclosure, the husband (or unfaithful partner), creates a time-line of his entire sexual history, starting from birth. For the next six to eight months, the addict has admitted to the problem but is in shock and disbelief. She feels angry and hopeless but ultimately relieved that she has finally admitted to having an addiction to sexual behaviors. The grief stage. In another six-month period, the sex addict goes through a type of grief. This takes time sometimes lots of time; If restoration of the marriage is to occur, the wife must firmly establish her boundaries, engage in the self-care of counseling and support, and be willing, at some time in the future, to be called to forgive him. We are called by God to forgive and forgiveness is one part of the restoration of the marriage. My heart has healed over these last 6 years as we have each grown into stronger, more compassionate people. The biggest victory for my husband has been his success at work. Before Covenant Eyes, he had started watching pornography at work multiple times each day. His boss was asking him why he spent so much time on his phone in the bathroom, and there was simply no excuse for his lack of productivity. Once, as I walked past, I saw some patients kicking this creature around and calling it names. I stopped and asked why they were abusing this ugly, but harmless, dragon. One patient replied, "He's green and ugly and reminds me of my addiction. I'm kicking him around because that is how I feel about my addiction.