I didn t really need to ask, because his actions and accountability tell me everything I need to know, but it was reassuring nonetheless when he told me, Covenant Eyes has removed the temptation for me. I feel like a weight has been lifted and I don t have the daily mental struggle of it all. Full Transparency Everyone deserves a marriage that has full transparency. At this point, the spouse faces a choice in her response to her partner s addiction and actions. Her response will determine whether she grows emotionally and spiritually, or whether she emotionally stagnates. She can either learn and grow, or she can stay mired in anger, betrayal, and distrust. It is crucial for the spouse to seek two things immediately upon disclosure. In fact, some time ago, I was inspired to write about this because a suffering spouse reached out to me. He felt emotionally stuck and unable to heal after his partner s unfaithfulness. During our individual therapy session, he shared something surprising and concerning. He told me he was having trouble surrendering to the healing process . The journey to despair occurs in isolation, but recovery from despair takes place in a safe and loving community. This means the sex addict faces a huge inner conflict to either stay in hiding or come out of hiding. Sexual acting out strengthens despair, leading an addict into greater isolation and shame. , a child being abused, violence in the family, a jailed parent, extreme stress of poverty, a rancorous divorce, an addicted parent, etc.), have a significant impact on how people live their lives and their risk of addiction and mental and physical illnesses. There are two types of addictions: substance and process (or behavioral) addictions. In this way our adult relationships mirror our relationship with our parents as children; both, when functioning well, provide us with a secure base from which we can enter our worlds with confidence. Breaking Bad If it is true that when we attach to someone healthy and functional, it feels good and provides a sense of security, grounding, safety and wholeness, then the opposite is also true.