Why Mindfulness Can Help You Both with Uncertainty By Carol Juergensen Sheets LCSW, CSAT, CCPS-S, PCC You as the addict are working hard to create safety, which is a new truth. The mind is conditioned to create certainty, which is a survival mechanism. The traumatized partner s mind is on a perpetual search to find more certainty, which can lead to more suffering, and yet it is the survival skill attempting to keep the partner safe. Twelve-step programs emphasize the need to completely abstain from the identified problematic behaviors, but this philosophy is not as straightforward as it sounds when it comes to sexual behavior. Instead of educating people about healthier sexuality, some recovery movements emphasize complete abstinence of sexual behavior, outside of marriage and committed relationships, which results in extreme pressure and self-imposed guilt and shame. Table of Contents The Neuroscience Behind Sex Addiction Neuroscience shows us that there is little difference in the physical or chemical changes in the pleasure and control centers of the brain, whether the addiction is from a chemical or an experience. Neurosurgeon Dr. Donald L. Hilton Jr. states, It is imperative that we treat pornography and sexual addiction with the respect accorded any drug addiction, for as we shall see, that is precisely what it is. With some of the messier, more complicated needs, if no clear option appears available to you right now and you are unable to come up with any alternatives after being active in your own hoop to communicate it relationally or attempt to meet it for yourself, can you surrender your need to God or your higher power, trusting that He may meet it or there may be something in it for you to learn about yourself? Someone suffering from both substance abuse and mental health issues, including sex addiction, is defined as having a co-occurring disorder. KeyStone Center ECU understands the importance of treating individuals with co-occurring disorders and takes this into consideration when developing an individualized treatment plan. The addicted person must come to a point in the active addiction process where he hurts enough to conclude that he wants his peace of mind back. He needs to want what he has lost, or what he is about to lose, more than he wants the emotionally mind-numbing and ultimately life-destroying effects of sex addiction.