Christians should rely on God s strength through prayer, Scripture, the Holy Spirit, and Christian community, rather than trying to conquer sin by their own efforts (Philippians 2:13). When a Christian struggles with temptation or even relapses, it doesn t mean God has abandoned them. Holiness is something God applies to the believer through their relationship with Jesus. Trauma is the problem, and for some, sexual acting out is the solution until the solution fails. And when it fails, it results in more trauma. Deep wounds suffered when young cause a level of pain that overwhelms the child. Because human beings are built to stay alive, the brain banishes the ordeal s worst feelings and memory. Many adjustments will need to be made in order to overcome sexual addiction. Changes include giving up sexual fantasizing and flirting, changes in the way one dresses, getting Internet filters, joining support groups and entering therapy. Honesty is the foundation to recovery for any addict, and it's no different for the sexual addict. People often avoid even discussing sex and sexual problems, but this same approach should not be used when clinically treating problems in sexual behavior. I have mistakenly referred past sex addict clients to support groups in which they were shamed for having sexual thoughts and masturbating. This triggered relapse behavior and a general clinical regression. In essence, the only difference between a heroin addict and a cocaine addict is the way the drug enters the system. The brain responds to information received from the eye quicker than from any other source. Visual information is processed in the limbic system in microseconds. This is why pornography is such a big deal. AVR-The Empathy Formula Practicing the A in AVR requires that you acknowledge the situation and accompanying pain. At first it can seem counterintuitive to bring up the damage your addiction has caused her. She wants to know that you remember her pain is a result of your actions. It assures her that you have not forgotten, nor are you in denial.