Christians should not expect instant perfection but rather steady progress. When a believer stumbles, they should confess, receive God s grace, and continue in the fight rather than fall into despair (1 John 1:9). 5. Holiness Means Living to Righteousness The Christian life is not just about avoiding sin the dying part but also about pursuing righteousness. The acting out had very little to do with the relationship or the partner. Many mental health professionals do not believe that sex addiction is a legitimate disorder. Therapists often think that the betrayed partner is the problem because they re not enough not attentive enough, not available enough, not sexual enough, not thin enough, not voluptuous enough. To avoid or correct this issue in your own marriage, establishing boundaries is crucial. Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend define boundaries as personal property lines that separate what s your responsibility (feelings, attitudes, choices, and behaviors) from what s your spouse s responsibility. Boundaries provide a framework for your husband to take responsibility for his own healing journey and give you the space to focus on your healing, which is equally important for the marriage s recovery. Someone s sexual addiction can also affect their loved ones, friends and work. The partner of a sex addict, for example, may feel disregarded, betrayed, devalued, replaced, insufficient and so on. If the additive behavior manifests in the workplace, the employer may have to terminate the person because the addictive behavior is affecting their work productivity. Changes include giving up sexual fantasizing and flirting, changes in the way one dresses, getting Internet filters, joining support groups and entering therapy. Honesty is the foundation to recovery for any addict, and it's no different for the sexual addict. Healing does not occur if secrets are kept. As you read the email I received below, ask yourself the following question: Is this individual seeking pornography as a mere form of healthy entertainment, or is he driven and compelled to have it? This email, below, comes from a highly respected man in his community who loves his family and is committed to providing for and caring for them.