Trusting a different therapist with the details of your relationship is no small thing. It takes a lot to offer trust and to earn it. Doing so after betrayal. Is a monumental feat. You don t need a therapist to make further demands! Your partner s struggles should not be depicted as unreasonable problems. Once, as I walked past, I saw some patients kicking this creature around and calling it names. I stopped and asked why they were abusing this ugly, but harmless, dragon. One patient replied, "He's green and ugly and reminds me of my addiction. I'm kicking him around because that is how I feel about my addiction. This makes recovery for sex addiction more similar to compulsive overeating where the goal is to manage food appropriately, not stop eating altogether. For many people, a good definition of sexual sobriety is to engage in sex only with a primary partner when true emotional intimacy is present. For other people the goal is simply to have no sexual secrets. Often a wife learns about unfaithful behaviors through her own accidental discovery or through more intentional detective work. Either might lead her to ask many questions that sometimes her husband may or may not be willing to answer. Truthful answers allow for more of the puzzle pieces to take shape. Forgiveness Healing of the mind, heart and soul can happen regardless of the magnitude of the deception. But in the absence of a healing/recovery process, the betrayed partner s anger intensifies and can cause them to be further traumatized by sifting through emails, texts and conversations, asking for every minute detail of the affair. This is especially true when the issue of sex addiction comes up. Sex addiction, also known as compulsive sexual behavior, has been defined as an excessive focus on and participation in sexual activities despite negative consequences. It can have extreme consequences on one s emotional, psychological and social well-being.