Rebuilding intimacy can also be facilitated through daily check-ins using the FANOS model, which covers feelings, affirmation, needs, owning actions, sobriety, and spiritual growth. The timing to resume sexual intimacy varies, but it s generally recommended to have at least 45 days of abstinence, with a true reboot possibly taking 90 days or longer. Therefore, they get stuck in a loop of negative behaviors. Patrick Carnes calls this The Offending Cycle . As a result, antidepressants and cognitive behavioral therapy are a common treatment option for sex addiction. Bipolar Disorders as Symptom and Cause Bipolar disorder can be both a cause and a symptom of compulsive sexual behavior, as, untreated bipolar disorder may lead to behaviors consistent with sex addiction. He admitted that this problem started as a young teenager with no restrictions to television or the internet. In those early days of this heartache coming to light, there were multiple relapses, dishonesty, denial, and an eventual separation. Tangible Solutions In addition to the help of professionals, we needed a tangible solution to a problem with a very specific technological outlet. Answering the why question The why question is what betrayed partners find themselves coming back to over and over again. Why did you engage in this behavior? Why did you lie repeatedly? Betrayed partners often feel that they can t move on and find closure without knowing the answer to the why question. Understanding these facts and the dynamic that hurt people can go on to hurt people can help a wife build empathy and can also help her to depersonalize his behaviors. She can hopefully hear in his story that these behaviors are not really about her, they are about much older and deeper pain. This is not an excuse for sinning; it is an opportunity to grow through pain. that take you out of yourself and away from those around you, acknowledging the behaviors as a problem and finding sobriety by eliminating those behaviors before they show up. But it s much more than that. Recovery is also very much about recognizing that much of who we ve presented ourselves to be to others, and many of the ways we ve chosen to do it, have been based on dishonesty.